Jami -
Wow, what an interesting post. I think that that is something that I learn about every day, but I wouldn't mind answering your questions.
1- What makes me happy?Knowing who I am. Whether it's the Gospel, my friends, my family, my Savior, or my talents, when I learn new things about myself, or feel confidence about the things I already know, I think that that is a big factor in making me happy.
2- When I'm unhappy, what do I change? Usually I'm unhappy because I feel like I'm lacking something, or because I'm worried what others think, or because I'm not doing something I should. A lot of times, it has to do with my prayers and scripture study. I also usually look for help in my friends or in PJ. I try to take their advice to heart to know what I should change.
3 - How does religion affect your happiness?Well, of course it makes me happy! With the gospel, we can know who we are, we can know how to change, how to make up for our mistakes. Stake conference really gave me a good desire to change and filled me with peace. Last night I was able to pray and read scriptures and that helped too. Our religion is a lifestyle that revolves around the Savior, around always becoming better, about friendship and family, about so many wonderful things that make us happy.
4- Do you think you have control over your own happiness?I think the time when we are the least happy is when we blame things on others. I heard a quote that says, "The only disability in life is a bad attitude." At times we find ourselves in situations where that is the only thing we feel control over. It's a hard thing to remember, but focusing on the Savior, on bettering ourselves, can really help with that. We have control over our actions, and happiness is also feeling good about the things you do. We definitely have control over our own happiness.
I think I'll post this on my blog as well, maybe it can help me remember what makes me happy. I love you, Jami! :)
I also really like what your friend said before me, I didn't read it until after I wrote my comments, but it's really awesome. It's going right along with the emphasis on service in our Stake Conference yesterday! :)
Monday, November 17, 2008
Saturday, November 15, 2008
A bit late
Debbie and Stephi looking cute!
These are some old pictures that Deb just put on Facebook. They were so cute I couldn't resist posting them on here. the pumpkin is one I made myself - I'm quite pleased with it! worked pretty hard - this is the first time I've ever carved a pumpkin myself. :)Gratitude List
This has been an interesting week. 2 weeks since my break up with Brian. I think it can be official now to say we broke up again. We have still been able to be good friends, I talked to him for a while yesterday. I still think I'm better off without being his girlfriend, even though it has been hard, some days harder than others. We've been working towards it for a while but it's been hard because we still love eachother, I think it will be a while before that completely goes away. But his friendship is worth it to me. The past couple of weeks we have learned that it's okay, that we can make it. only a week and a half until I see him again. I am nervous, but as long as I remember why it's best, I know that we can maintain just being friends.
Lately, I've found strength from my friends. It's not just me who's struggling with boys. A lot of friends are, so even though we have different situations we can be there for each other and lament and get excited for each other. I have been growing closer to people I thought I would never get close to. Like my violista friend Mary, I had no idea we had so much in common in general. I get really excited about friendship, because I am so passionate about it.
I also was able to spend time with Trish yesterday, and I am really glad to have her back in my life. We have both changed a lot since last time we were close, so much that in a way, it feels like I am best friends with someone new. Maybe she feels that way about me too. It's a bit harder to notice changes in myself. I'm grateful for her. I'm grateful that we made invitations together - they are truly amazing and she has great creative talent! I'm so excited to show everyone.
I am grateful for my calling. I still can't describe how much it is already blessing my life. I definitely need the sisters in the presidency. I need their advice and their spirits and their support. They are great examples to me in everything that I do.
I am grateful that I was able to practice in the lecture hall last night. I have been having like 0 motivation since my hearing. I'm really trying though, it's not too late yet!
I am grateful for skype. It's helped me to be able to contact people, and to talk to Brian who I missed a lot. It's been a challenge not having a phone. :( but it's a good experience, I guess, kept me from talking to Brian too much. It's humbling to not have something so I can call anyone when I have a problem or want to take care of something, I've had to e-mail, which can be a good thing.
I am grateful for my Heavenly Father and Savior, I am still having trouble getting myself to read scriptures the way I should, but They still love me and still have blessed me. I think I am going to go read now. I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!
Love,
Sunshine
Lately, I've found strength from my friends. It's not just me who's struggling with boys. A lot of friends are, so even though we have different situations we can be there for each other and lament and get excited for each other. I have been growing closer to people I thought I would never get close to. Like my violista friend Mary, I had no idea we had so much in common in general. I get really excited about friendship, because I am so passionate about it.
I also was able to spend time with Trish yesterday, and I am really glad to have her back in my life. We have both changed a lot since last time we were close, so much that in a way, it feels like I am best friends with someone new. Maybe she feels that way about me too. It's a bit harder to notice changes in myself. I'm grateful for her. I'm grateful that we made invitations together - they are truly amazing and she has great creative talent! I'm so excited to show everyone.
I am grateful for my calling. I still can't describe how much it is already blessing my life. I definitely need the sisters in the presidency. I need their advice and their spirits and their support. They are great examples to me in everything that I do.
I am grateful that I was able to practice in the lecture hall last night. I have been having like 0 motivation since my hearing. I'm really trying though, it's not too late yet!
I am grateful for skype. It's helped me to be able to contact people, and to talk to Brian who I missed a lot. It's been a challenge not having a phone. :( but it's a good experience, I guess, kept me from talking to Brian too much. It's humbling to not have something so I can call anyone when I have a problem or want to take care of something, I've had to e-mail, which can be a good thing.
I am grateful for my Heavenly Father and Savior, I am still having trouble getting myself to read scriptures the way I should, but They still love me and still have blessed me. I think I am going to go read now. I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!
Love,
Sunshine
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Prayer
I love my violista and complicated relationships friend Mary, she gave me some great advice about prayer and faith. It's incredible. She said to dedicate time to writing about my worries, and then the rest of the day to focus on other things, but what? My viola, Mexico, or my future husband, whoever he may be, or some other talent, art, how about crochet? Poetry. oh yeah! there was this poem I wanted to post - it's sad but amazing. I can't express how grateful I am for blogging, and the blog that Brian and I have together. It's great to write because we think more clearly, and we can vent out our stress and worries and good feelings constructively, and go back and remember the things we've learned. I know that my Heavenly Father loves me and will help everything be okay.
Last night, I felt the Spirit more, it was great. :) Today has been a better day.
Love,
Sunshine
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Gratitude Lists and Life
It's been a while since I wrote in here. It's still been difficult to write, but things are building up, so I need to write a gratitude list.
I am grateful to my Heavenly Father that:
-I PASSED MY RECITAL HEARING! Yay!!
-My parents are sending me another phone - It is so lame being phone-less.
-The test today was much easier than I thought
-My friend wasn't mad that I missed our meeting yesterday.
-I got to see an old time friend, and make a new friend (and they knew each other which was totally crazy - I saw them within a half hour of each other.)
-I helped this new friend translate a poem - he seemed pretty impressed with my poetry and Spanish skills.
-I have been gaining more confidence in myself. I know I definitely can't do that on my own.
-I love my roommates Debbie and Emily. They are awesome. I got to go to the store with Debbie yesterday and watch P and P with Emily the other day. They are good company.
-I love my new calling. I feel inadequate because a secretary is supposed to be organized. I am notorious for being unorganized. Maybe helping the R.S. stay calm and organized will help myself - okay, definitely. There are so many ways that this is right, I don't think I even know, though I have an idea. Every time I think about it or receive a text or e-mail from Annalaura, I feel the Spirit really strong. It's humbling.
- Only 2 months until Mexico!
-2 weeks until my recital.
-2 weeks until I can see my family.
-I am more independent - I am supergirl. I am a daughter of God.
-I love my friends.
-I made money at work. Money is good.
-I was able to spend time with Brian's family and his little niece and nephews. They are as adorable as ever.
:)
I hope everyone is having a great week! I will see you all soon.
Love,
Stephi
I am grateful to my Heavenly Father that:
-I PASSED MY RECITAL HEARING! Yay!!
-My parents are sending me another phone - It is so lame being phone-less.
-The test today was much easier than I thought
-My friend wasn't mad that I missed our meeting yesterday.
-I got to see an old time friend, and make a new friend (and they knew each other which was totally crazy - I saw them within a half hour of each other.)
-I helped this new friend translate a poem - he seemed pretty impressed with my poetry and Spanish skills.
-I have been gaining more confidence in myself. I know I definitely can't do that on my own.
-I love my roommates Debbie and Emily. They are awesome. I got to go to the store with Debbie yesterday and watch P and P with Emily the other day. They are good company.
-I love my new calling. I feel inadequate because a secretary is supposed to be organized. I am notorious for being unorganized. Maybe helping the R.S. stay calm and organized will help myself - okay, definitely. There are so many ways that this is right, I don't think I even know, though I have an idea. Every time I think about it or receive a text or e-mail from Annalaura, I feel the Spirit really strong. It's humbling.
- Only 2 months until Mexico!
-2 weeks until my recital.
-2 weeks until I can see my family.
-I am more independent - I am supergirl. I am a daughter of God.
-I love my friends.
-I made money at work. Money is good.
-I was able to spend time with Brian's family and his little niece and nephews. They are as adorable as ever.
:)
I hope everyone is having a great week! I will see you all soon.
Love,
Stephi
Friday, November 7, 2008
So many tips
I haven't felt like writing too much.
I'm trying to figure things out.
Stress with my recital - I think I have been just making a bigger deal out of it than it is. I just need to realize that I'm going to be great, no matter what happens. I've worked so hard for this. I've just got to trust myself now, and trust that my Heavenly Father will help me.
Mary said to be Diva Stephanie when I'm on stage - to get all cute and be totally confident - a different character if I have to be.
Mr. Fedotov said to act like I'm a composer when I play - every note is there for a reason - express that reason, your reason, like you're writing it on the spot while you're performing it. That really helped my playing.
Jamilyn said Bach 1-2-3 rule. love it. I wrote down some other things she said too. I'll post more soon.
Love,
Stephanie
Sunday, November 2, 2008
"My Grace is Sufficient for you.."
Wow.
What a week.
I have had a really, really rough weekend, that I'm trying to forgive myself and make up for and let go of the way I acted and the way things happened, my super moodiness and unfortunately at the same time I felt trapped, is there any way to make up for making mistakes and letting people down?
And the only way I could let go and forgive myself was through my Sunday. Today was definitely a Sunday made for me. I could tell a lot of people felt that way, but I know without a doubt that I needed today.
Today I woke up feeling pretty bad from "girl stuff" and from such an emotionally draining past couple of days. Satan was still bothering me, even after 10 hours of sleep! But when I went to choir with Jamilyn's amazing choir leading skills ;) - and she really did a great job. It reminds me of our practicing sessions together. She's good at taking different ways to solve hard spots and to look at a piece or a line of music. And she makes it fun, and it makes great progress too. It's nice to sing again too. And I talked to Emily, and even though I thought she was mad at me she wasn't, and that helped a lot, especially spending good quality time with her today too. I love her.
And such an amazing testimony meeting. Every testimony helped my own. And when I bore my testimony I talked about how I remembered a scripture, My Grace is sufficient for you, after all that you can do. Mike was talking about how perfect the Savior was. If someone that perfect can forgive me after all that I can do, then I'm sure everyone else does too. And, perhaps most importantly, I can forgive myself (and that's the one I have the most trouble with). I felt so much better.
And everyone's testimonies were reminding me of that same thing, and I looked in the topical guide for that scripture and I couldn't find the one that said after all that we can do, but I definitely found some that said My Grace is sufficient for you, and that was a powerful message. I hope I was able to help remind people just as I was being reminded. Jamilyn's testimony seemed similar to what I was thinking and it was powerful because I look up to her so much, and she keeps trying to remind me that I'm awesome too. And Kari's message was really powerful and encouraging, I wish I could remember exactly what she said, something about trials and how we handle them or that we are amazing or both. lol.
I felt so encouraged also because my fast was that I would be less stressed out. And today when I had a trial, instead of handling it negatively (which often happens), I handled it positively, and even kinda laughed about it. And I was really pleased, that not only was Heavenly Father answering my prayer, but he was making a trial for my good - without that trial, I wouldn't've had that chance to improve, and wouldn't have felt so good about myself or felt like my prayer was answered so fast. It was a real blessing. I hope I can handle more trials that way.
Everyone loved our orchestra concert. Orch gets me so pumped!
Afterwards was break the fast, and some of us came at the tail end of it, and Me and Trish and Brie and AL and Jamilyn and her parents were sitting around the table and that was nice. And there was still yummy food left for us to feast upon... yummmmm. lol I am also grateful that Annalaura prayed and received inspiration for me to be the relief society secretary. It is so fast after my last callings but the Spirit is really confirming it. It's where I need to be. Plus I get to see her and the other members of the presidency more and serve together. I'm really excited about that, and it's an honor to serve and work with the relief society sisters. It's humbling and I hope that I work hard to fulfill it well.
And of course, the wonderful talk by the presiding Bishop Burton. It was like, an answer to what I was thinking. When others are dissappointed with me, if I work really hard to do what the Lord wants me to do, I can make something of myself, and later, they will be impressed by it if not right away. It was great encouragement. He also talked about prayer and how we need the Lord's hand in the direction of our lives.
I love Sundays.
Well, I should go work on my composition. I'm kindof excited about it. Flute and Viola duet. woot! I love you all, I hope everyone has a wonderful night.
Love,
Sunshine
What a week.
I have had a really, really rough weekend, that I'm trying to forgive myself and make up for and let go of the way I acted and the way things happened, my super moodiness and unfortunately at the same time I felt trapped, is there any way to make up for making mistakes and letting people down?
And the only way I could let go and forgive myself was through my Sunday. Today was definitely a Sunday made for me. I could tell a lot of people felt that way, but I know without a doubt that I needed today.
Today I woke up feeling pretty bad from "girl stuff" and from such an emotionally draining past couple of days. Satan was still bothering me, even after 10 hours of sleep! But when I went to choir with Jamilyn's amazing choir leading skills ;) - and she really did a great job. It reminds me of our practicing sessions together. She's good at taking different ways to solve hard spots and to look at a piece or a line of music. And she makes it fun, and it makes great progress too. It's nice to sing again too. And I talked to Emily, and even though I thought she was mad at me she wasn't, and that helped a lot, especially spending good quality time with her today too. I love her.
And such an amazing testimony meeting. Every testimony helped my own. And when I bore my testimony I talked about how I remembered a scripture, My Grace is sufficient for you, after all that you can do. Mike was talking about how perfect the Savior was. If someone that perfect can forgive me after all that I can do, then I'm sure everyone else does too. And, perhaps most importantly, I can forgive myself (and that's the one I have the most trouble with). I felt so much better.
And everyone's testimonies were reminding me of that same thing, and I looked in the topical guide for that scripture and I couldn't find the one that said after all that we can do, but I definitely found some that said My Grace is sufficient for you, and that was a powerful message. I hope I was able to help remind people just as I was being reminded. Jamilyn's testimony seemed similar to what I was thinking and it was powerful because I look up to her so much, and she keeps trying to remind me that I'm awesome too. And Kari's message was really powerful and encouraging, I wish I could remember exactly what she said, something about trials and how we handle them or that we are amazing or both. lol.
I felt so encouraged also because my fast was that I would be less stressed out. And today when I had a trial, instead of handling it negatively (which often happens), I handled it positively, and even kinda laughed about it. And I was really pleased, that not only was Heavenly Father answering my prayer, but he was making a trial for my good - without that trial, I wouldn't've had that chance to improve, and wouldn't have felt so good about myself or felt like my prayer was answered so fast. It was a real blessing. I hope I can handle more trials that way.
Everyone loved our orchestra concert. Orch gets me so pumped!
Afterwards was break the fast, and some of us came at the tail end of it, and Me and Trish and Brie and AL and Jamilyn and her parents were sitting around the table and that was nice. And there was still yummy food left for us to feast upon... yummmmm. lol I am also grateful that Annalaura prayed and received inspiration for me to be the relief society secretary. It is so fast after my last callings but the Spirit is really confirming it. It's where I need to be. Plus I get to see her and the other members of the presidency more and serve together. I'm really excited about that, and it's an honor to serve and work with the relief society sisters. It's humbling and I hope that I work hard to fulfill it well.
And of course, the wonderful talk by the presiding Bishop Burton. It was like, an answer to what I was thinking. When others are dissappointed with me, if I work really hard to do what the Lord wants me to do, I can make something of myself, and later, they will be impressed by it if not right away. It was great encouragement. He also talked about prayer and how we need the Lord's hand in the direction of our lives.
I love Sundays.
Well, I should go work on my composition. I'm kindof excited about it. Flute and Viola duet. woot! I love you all, I hope everyone has a wonderful night.
Love,
Sunshine
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